From January 27, 2009
Mother puss bucket.
I broke my pinky toe. How lame is that? I dropped the corner of a 28 pound plastic bucket of cat litter on my pinky toe. That's even more lame.
And you know what? It fucking hurts. I thought I was fine and had just hurt it but not anything as severe as broke it. Well I hobble corrected. The bonus of this kind of injury is there is nothing I can do about it. I taped it to it's neighbor and put ice on it. I have vicodin lying around that I can't take at work because it might make me slip into a dreamy heaven. That's it. That's all you can do. I've got my sweet gangster lean going on as I gimp around. This is bullshit. Pure bullshit.
I hope Jameson is happy he has clean litter to poo in.
Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pain. Show all posts
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Brace Face
From October 15, 2008
I got braces put on my teeth on Monday afternoon. I'm basically a glutton for punishment. Can I blame the drugs? My ridiculous sense of being a Wonder Woman? My hard and fast independent streak? Or pure ignorance?
After all I've been through in the past 2 weeks I seriously sat down in that chair and had them cement brackets to my teeth. I started to panic when they put all that shit in my mouth that keeps your tongue and lips out of the way. It was almost like I felt claustrophobic, like I was in the MRI machine again. I almost said yeah, I can't do this. Laying back on the chair I forgot how to breathe. My tongue slid back against my throat and I forgot I had control over it. My tonsils were so fucking huge that there is a lot of extra room back there now. When I drink something it still feels like it wants to come out of my nose. I didn't think it would be this much adjustment, or any kind of adjustment, really. Live and learn.
So I fought through my paranoia and survived. It only took about an hour. I opted for the "clear" bracket braces. I saw a girl at a play recently and standing 5 feet from her I could hardly tell she had them, so I figure from stage it would be practically impossible. I was surprised when I went in for my consultation to learn that the Invisilign, which I originally wanted, was $1300 more than regular braces, would take longer and would less effective. So I opted for your old school braces and for the past two days I have been regretting it.
I broke down yesterday afternoon. I have just had way too much drama in my mouth-hole for the past two weeks and I hadn't cried since the first vommiting experience. It was all just too much. I probably should have waited a few weeks until I was more back to normal than to rush and get them on now, but I was thinking long term and the sooner I get them on the sooner I can get them off. I had been warned of the pain involved but I guess I didn't believe it. Last night my teeth were simply throbbing and, oddly enough, itching. I could feel the roots simply itching in my face. I've worn sores on my cheeks and I can't bite down all the way. When I did, my front teeth were hitting the brackets on my bottom teeth so they put this cement on the bottom of two of my molars, one on each side, to prevent that from happening. How I'm ever supposed to chew again is beyond me. I broke down and bought Anbesol last night and thank the fucking lord I did. Sweet, sweet numbness.
I'm on the liquid diet. Naked Juice protien drinks, Carnation Instant Breakfast, soups, baby food, humus, and the shit-ton if ice cream I have left over. I have only had water, Gatorade, and ice tea for the past 2 weeks. No soda and no alcohol. I'm hoping the lack of binge drinking will show up on the scale. The vicodin still running through my system has put a damper on my hunger, as well as the pain in my teeth. It seems to have subsided today, thank God. I was freaking out on Monday night thinking this was a horrible mistake and I never should have done it. I'm just tired of feeling jacked-up and in pain and uncomfortable and angry. I need a vacation from my illnesses.
I always wanted braces but they were something we couldn't afford. I was also afraid that boys wouldn't like me. So good idea Niki, wait until you're 30. I didn't have a boyfriend in high school, I should have just gotten it over with then. I've also never had that big of a problem with my teeth. It's not like I'm a snagglepuss... "Exit stage left even!" But I thought having straight teeth would be nice and I found a great deal and I should only have these for a little less than a year and a half. I just wonder if, when I'm done, I'll start looking skeptically at my nose. Eh, I doubt it.
And speaking of being single, feel free to set me up with awesome guys you may know. I'm a catch, damn it! I just don't get asked out. I don't know if I intimidate the shit out of guys or what the deal is but I'm rad and I would like an equally rad gentleman friend. Help a sista out, wouldya?!
We thank you for your support.
I got braces put on my teeth on Monday afternoon. I'm basically a glutton for punishment. Can I blame the drugs? My ridiculous sense of being a Wonder Woman? My hard and fast independent streak? Or pure ignorance?
After all I've been through in the past 2 weeks I seriously sat down in that chair and had them cement brackets to my teeth. I started to panic when they put all that shit in my mouth that keeps your tongue and lips out of the way. It was almost like I felt claustrophobic, like I was in the MRI machine again. I almost said yeah, I can't do this. Laying back on the chair I forgot how to breathe. My tongue slid back against my throat and I forgot I had control over it. My tonsils were so fucking huge that there is a lot of extra room back there now. When I drink something it still feels like it wants to come out of my nose. I didn't think it would be this much adjustment, or any kind of adjustment, really. Live and learn.
So I fought through my paranoia and survived. It only took about an hour. I opted for the "clear" bracket braces. I saw a girl at a play recently and standing 5 feet from her I could hardly tell she had them, so I figure from stage it would be practically impossible. I was surprised when I went in for my consultation to learn that the Invisilign, which I originally wanted, was $1300 more than regular braces, would take longer and would less effective. So I opted for your old school braces and for the past two days I have been regretting it.
I broke down yesterday afternoon. I have just had way too much drama in my mouth-hole for the past two weeks and I hadn't cried since the first vommiting experience. It was all just too much. I probably should have waited a few weeks until I was more back to normal than to rush and get them on now, but I was thinking long term and the sooner I get them on the sooner I can get them off. I had been warned of the pain involved but I guess I didn't believe it. Last night my teeth were simply throbbing and, oddly enough, itching. I could feel the roots simply itching in my face. I've worn sores on my cheeks and I can't bite down all the way. When I did, my front teeth were hitting the brackets on my bottom teeth so they put this cement on the bottom of two of my molars, one on each side, to prevent that from happening. How I'm ever supposed to chew again is beyond me. I broke down and bought Anbesol last night and thank the fucking lord I did. Sweet, sweet numbness.
I'm on the liquid diet. Naked Juice protien drinks, Carnation Instant Breakfast, soups, baby food, humus, and the shit-ton if ice cream I have left over. I have only had water, Gatorade, and ice tea for the past 2 weeks. No soda and no alcohol. I'm hoping the lack of binge drinking will show up on the scale. The vicodin still running through my system has put a damper on my hunger, as well as the pain in my teeth. It seems to have subsided today, thank God. I was freaking out on Monday night thinking this was a horrible mistake and I never should have done it. I'm just tired of feeling jacked-up and in pain and uncomfortable and angry. I need a vacation from my illnesses.
I always wanted braces but they were something we couldn't afford. I was also afraid that boys wouldn't like me. So good idea Niki, wait until you're 30. I didn't have a boyfriend in high school, I should have just gotten it over with then. I've also never had that big of a problem with my teeth. It's not like I'm a snagglepuss... "Exit stage left even!" But I thought having straight teeth would be nice and I found a great deal and I should only have these for a little less than a year and a half. I just wonder if, when I'm done, I'll start looking skeptically at my nose. Eh, I doubt it.
And speaking of being single, feel free to set me up with awesome guys you may know. I'm a catch, damn it! I just don't get asked out. I don't know if I intimidate the shit out of guys or what the deal is but I'm rad and I would like an equally rad gentleman friend. Help a sista out, wouldya?!
We thank you for your support.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Tonsil Hockey
Oh, tonsils. Those dirty little bastards in the back of my throat. They've been evicted and their move out date in 9/29.
I hear it's going to be pretty damn awesome. And by awesome I mean wicked painful. I'll be off work for two weeks, without pay which makes it double awesome, and living off liquidy type things. I hear tell I'll lose 10-15 pounds that I'll put right back on when I start eating again. So I'm just not going to eat anymore. I mean, screw food. What has it ever done for ME?
Both of my parents, count 'em - both, are driving out to take me to the hospital and bring me home. I knew it would take a medical malfunction to get my parents to come visit me. They don't get out so much.
I get tonsillitis at least twice a year, usually in the summer and then around Christmas. I have to see a doctor 3 times for each infection they're so bad. Sometimes they swell up and touch each other in the back of my throat leaving me a pea size opening to breathe through. Those are the best times. Then I go to the ER and get shot full of morphine and vicodin and go home and halucinate strange creatures jumping out of the shadows trying to kill me. I know you're jealous.
So I've had about enough of that shit right there. Time to scrape 'em out. I've read some down right horror stories about how painful it is and I'm trying not to think about it. I'm just tired of being sick and hopefully this will cure me of that. I'ma see if they'll let me keep them. In a jar. I can shelack them and make an amulet. Who wants first dibs?
I hear it's going to be pretty damn awesome. And by awesome I mean wicked painful. I'll be off work for two weeks, without pay which makes it double awesome, and living off liquidy type things. I hear tell I'll lose 10-15 pounds that I'll put right back on when I start eating again. So I'm just not going to eat anymore. I mean, screw food. What has it ever done for ME?
Both of my parents, count 'em - both, are driving out to take me to the hospital and bring me home. I knew it would take a medical malfunction to get my parents to come visit me. They don't get out so much.
I get tonsillitis at least twice a year, usually in the summer and then around Christmas. I have to see a doctor 3 times for each infection they're so bad. Sometimes they swell up and touch each other in the back of my throat leaving me a pea size opening to breathe through. Those are the best times. Then I go to the ER and get shot full of morphine and vicodin and go home and halucinate strange creatures jumping out of the shadows trying to kill me. I know you're jealous.
So I've had about enough of that shit right there. Time to scrape 'em out. I've read some down right horror stories about how painful it is and I'm trying not to think about it. I'm just tired of being sick and hopefully this will cure me of that. I'ma see if they'll let me keep them. In a jar. I can shelack them and make an amulet. Who wants first dibs?
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